Ogre of the Forest

Hey! Where are you going? Would you like to sit down with me? I have been reading this fascinating book of fairy tales. Look at this picture of an ogre, I guess this is supposed to represent me, but I don’t look like this. Sure, I am green. Yes, my teeth are pointy, and my ears are large. It is true I am strong, but as far as my temperament goes, I am not quick to anger, nor am I nasty, and I certainly don’t do the things stated in these tales.

I have found a sweet house in this village of PnF and am moving in. I could help you move furniture or carry logs for the fireplace, and I would love to join you and your pets for walks in the woods. I know a lot about woodlore.

Pull up a stump and sit for a while. I can put some more logs on the campfire if you are chilly. The air in the forest can become quite cool in the summer or late at night. I love to come out here and sit and think.

This is nice; I am glad you could join me. Oh, that rustling in the bushes are just the small furry forest friends; usually, they would join me, but they are a bit shy and may take a while to become sure of you.

Hello again. Now that we know each other better, how about we play a game? I am great at football, or perhaps you would like to play volleyball? I promise not to land on you and squash you in a tackle, and I won’t lob the ball hard if we play over a net. I don’t know how many more nice days we will get this fall, and then it will be time for winter sports, though I am a bit wobbly on skates. What do you say?

Your pet becomes an expert at finding its own food!

Well, let’s face it, it’s a tale as old as time. Some badger boys were sitting around the hill one day, when a pretty little thang walked by and caught their eye.

“Do you lift?” she asked, batting her lashes, and the badger boys scrambled to answer, “Boy, do I!”, “You bet I lift.”, “I could bench three of you, little darlin’!”, proceeding to strike their best poses.

After a demonstration of their skills, during which several boulders were lifted and dropped, a toe or two broken, the fair damsel cooed, “If you can lift more than me, I’ll let you catch my dinner.”

The game was on! The badger boys bumped chests, high-fived, snickered a bit, and eyed this pretty petal and wondered who would best her first.

In no time at all, the badger boys were beat, having lifted without much preparation, and panted on the ground at the sweet maid’s feet. Still, there was no way she was going to beat them! So, imagine their surprise when this bashful badger doll slowly cracked her back, her neck, and her knuckles, and demonstrated a dead lift that left the boys bamboozled!

“How’d you do it, doll?” they demanded to know.

“Patience,” she simpered, winking as she walked away, “persistence, and practice. You should try it some time.”

That was the day the competition was born.

Favorite food:

Haggis

See below for your free foods!