Gollum is questing! Episode 1/25

Welcome, all! We hope you enjoy our little adventure in space!

Gollum is questing! Episode 2/25

Treble was enjoying the air by the fast-flowing stream, chatting to Gollum. It was a day like any other, and they had no inkling of the strange adventure that would unfold very shortly!
Gollum saw a flash of pink, and looking up, saw a strange-looking little pink man standing watching them.
"Greetings, Earthlings!" said the little man. "I hope I didn't startle you. I come from a planet far away and have been planning this trip to your planet for quite some time now!"
"Gracious!" said Treble. "You speak our language very well! What's your name?"
"Oh, as to that, we don't really have names where I come from. There's no need for them. But if you would like to call me a name, I think the nearest equivalent would be something like 'Dash'. And I confess, I can't speak your language. My thoughts are being translated into a way you can understand, you see."
"Wow!" remarked Gollum. "Well, my friend is called Treble, and I'm Gollum. We're both very happy to meet you."

Gollum is questing! Episode 3/25

"Perhaps you would like to come and see my space podule?" said Dash. "I've left a trail to get back to it—although, of course, I didn't really need to. It's transmitting a signal to my internal computer. But I thought I'd try and fit in with your quaint local customs, you know."
Nothing loth, Gollum and Treble followed the little man, admiring the sparkling floating gems on the way.
"This is so exciting!" said Treble. "I've never seen a spaceship before!"
"Ah, well, it's not actually a spaceship," explained Dash. "It's my transport podule, designed for travelling to and from the spacecraft and landing on other planets."

Gollum is questing! Episode 4/25

The clearing in the wood seemed dimmed by the brilliance of the lights emanating from the space vehicle confronting Treble.
"Welcome to my podule," said Dash. "By the way, this is Trill-o-byte. He'll be wanting to stretch his legs."
Treble and Gollum looked round with smiles of welcome, expecting to see another little pink man. Then Treble gasped and hurriedly jumped on a rock when a large, bright green, six-legged creature suddenly emerged. "Lovely!" gasped Treble. "It must be good to have, um, a nice pet for company on a long space voyage!"
"Well, he's actually a technician," responded Dash. "But yes, it's agreeable to have company!"
"Can we have a go in the space podule, Dash?" asked Gollum eagerly. "It would be so exciting!"
"Of course!" replied Dash. "Perhaps we could go somewhere on your planet of technological or scientific interest?"

Gollum is questing! Episode 5/25

Gollum and Treble exchanged doubtful glances. "We could go into town?" suggested Treble.
"What is 'town'?" asked the little man.
"You know, it's a collection of buildings and shops," said Gollum.
Dash looked blank. "What is 'shops'?" he queried. Then he laughed at the expression on his new friends' faces. "It's all right, I studied your culture before I came here. I know what shops are—it will be interesting to see them, because we don't have possessions where I come from, or not in the sense you'd understand them."
Gollum and Treble smiled politely but uncomprehendingly. They had a brief, exhilarating flight in the podule into the town centre, where Treble invited Windsor, the corgi, to join them. Windsor and Trill-o-byte made friends instantly, and the latter enjoyed capering around the cobbled streets, which were unlike anything he'd come across before.
Dash stopped short. "What is this—item?" he queried.
Gollum grinned. "You mean the bicycle? We use them to get around. You push down on each pedal in turn, and that rotates the wheels."
Dash was looking blank. "It looks very complicated," he remarked.

Gollum is questing! Episode 6/25

The High Street was abustle with many pets enjoying an afternoon's shopping.
"Ah, a museum of ancient transportation devices," observed Dash, stopping outside the travel agent's. Gollum and Treble giggled, and Windsor and Trill-o-byte accompanied Gollum inside to pick up some brochures.
"We'd go on the jet airliner to a holiday destination," explained Treble. "Or you can go up in a hot air balloon. And the biplane here—it's advertising special trips from a nearby aerodrome. The pilot can loop the loop, you know—that means he flies the plane in a complete circle!"
Dash contemplated his own, faster than light, incredibly sophisticated spaceship and refrained from comment. "If you would like an aerial adventure, why don't you come back with me to my planet for a visit?"
Treble stood on the pavement, open-mouthed and wide-eyed at the thought. They were rejoined by the rest of their little team, and discussed Dash's offer animatedly.
"I mean, it's, you know, safe, isn't it?" ventured Gollum.
But Dash could not compute a meaning for "safe" or "unsafe" and strangely, that was enough to overcome any lingering doubts they had about whether to go.

Gollum is questing! Episode 7/25

They returned in the podule to where Dash's spaceship was hovering very high up. As they approached, a large hatchway opened up automatically and the podule nestled neatly inside the spaceship, and then they all went up to what looked like a large viewing gallery. They passed many amazing planets, plus a kind of black hole. Dash explained as best he could what they were passing.

Gollum is questing! Episode 8/25

The spaceship landed neatly beside a bank of smaller podules with robots waiting to assist them. Feeling very nervous now they were actually here, Gollum, Treble and Windsor alighted from the spaceship and took their places in the transition vehicles.

Gollum is questing! Episode 9/25

Their podule stopped inside a hatchway in the side of a very large, modular building constructed of what looked like shiny stainless steel but which felt very strange, almost like silk, to the touch. Once they had disembarked inside, they were whirled down a rotating tunnel with no gravity. They were wafted to the end of the tube in complete comfort.
"It's a kind of quarantine tunnel," explained Dash. "It performs what you might call a biomedical scan. So—all's well! Come and relax in our hospitality lounge!"

Gollum is questing! Episode 10/25

After they were sufficiently rested, they all eagerly followed Dash for a tour of the building. They were quite confused, because although the rooms they visited were very clean and minimalist, not to say stark, in design, the explanations that it was necessary for Dash to give tended towards the extremely scientific and none of them was a scientist. They couldn't even understand the name of the planet they were on!
After some time, Gollum wandered off for some personal sightseeing, and Treble, thinking this unwise, tried to catch him up.

Gollum is questing! Episode 11/25

Treble was passing down a long corridor made of the silky steel material, when there was a near-silent swoosh as a pair of metal doors opened. Treble ventured closer and peeped in.
The room was dark, with a few grey, wispy creatures moving around in a floating motion. They did look sinister! Treble shivered, and wished suddenly he was with his friends.
Then Dalek-like voices started. "The Earthlings are here. Commence the cloning procedure!"
"Cloning will commence immediately!" responded another grey shade.
Treble gulped in alarm. He backed carefully out of the room, then once outside, ran as fast as he could, shouting for Gollum and Windsor.

Gollum is questing! Episode 12/25

Gollum was nowhere to be seen, but Treble grabbed his canine friend.
"Windsor! It's all an evil plot to ensnare and exploit us! Quick, let's hide in this—this cupboard thing, whatever it is. They mustn't catch us! We'll wait till they're all gone, then we'll find Gollum and escape!"
Trill-o-byte watched, bemused, as Treble climbed into the transformation portal with an uncomprehending but eager Windsor not far behind.
"How does the door close?" cried Treble, pressing all the levers and switches he could see.

Gollum is questing! Episode 13/25

There was a moment's silence, then zipping and zapping sounds broke out as Treble and Windsor were shot through the tube. The machine went momentarily quiet, then just one creature was ejected from the second portal.

Gollum is questing! Episode 14/25

"Oh my stars! What have I done?" moaned Treble. "Where's Windsor? Why have I got two furry ears? What's happened?"
Dash hurried up. "Treble, they were joking! Quick, let me sort this out."
He helped the Treble/Windsor amalgam back into the portal and pressed some switches.
"Ah, Control+Z?" queried Trill-o-byte. Dash looked at him in exasperation as the transformation portal started to hum and buzz again. "That wasn't even amusing the first time," he snapped.
A few seconds later, an unharmed Treble and Windsor emerged from the machine.

Gollum is questing! Episode 15/25

But the shaken Treble was still in a panic. He dived straight back into the portal. "Get it to send us both back to Earth!" he cried, again flicking all the switches he could see. "Windsor, get in here!"
Dash firmly stopped Windsor, who was giving happy and enthusiastic yelps in anticipation of another go in the machine, from climbing in after Treble. In a few seconds' time, Treble shot out of the second portal once more. He walked a few yards with difficulty.
"Oh my goodness. I need a walking stick! My fur's turned all white! And why am I craving a Werther's original?"
Dash sighed. "You turned on the ageing process in your haste. Look, Treble, my colleagues weren't being serious! They were having you on, as you say on Earth. They had to practise for ages to get the Dalek voices right."
He picked Treble up, stuffed him back in the portal and transformed him back.

Gollum is questing! Episode 16/25

Treble sat down on the floor, trying to calm his nerves. "I feel very silly," he said. "The Wisps were very, you know, convincing!"
"I know," said Dash understandingly. "If I hadn't had to go after Gollum, I'd have caught up with you sooner. Gollum was looking for something to eat—that he recognised, I mean. Of course, our energy intake isn't quite what you'd—anyway, never mind. If you're recovered, we'll continue our little tour."
The little group continued. The next room was sufficiently colourful and interesting to allow Treble to overcome his embarrassment. Dash explained that each colour had its own distinct frequency or vibration depending on its wavelength. Violet had the shortest wavelength but the highest frequency, with the spectrum going all the way up to red, which had the longest wavelength. Dash mentioned several colours with which those from Earth were unfamiliar! He then said the green creature they could see was being created by the energy emitted by the wavelengths.

Gollum is questing! Episode 17/25

The group went inside what looked like another laboratory, and were awestruck by the swaying, pastel-coloured creatures they could see.
"Wow!" breathed Treble. "Are these creatures being created here in some way, too?"
"Oh no," replied Dash. "These are beings from the next planet on a visit. They are performing what I believe you would call 'interpretive dance' on Earth. I am wholly unfamiliar with it." His tone implied that he would rather not become any more familiar with it than he needed to.
However, his visitors found it quite beautiful, not to say mesmerising.

Gollum is questing! Episode 18/25

The next room they visited contained vibrant springs of water.
Treble was surprised. "I thought only Earth had water!" he said.
For the hundredth time that day, Dash was bewildered by the almost total lack of scientific knowledge displayed by the Earthlings! They were from a very backward planet, certainly, but how had they succeeded in developing anything at all? "It's true some planets don't have water," he explained. "The one known to you as Venus, for example. Others only have frozen water. The planet you call 'Mercury' has ice at its poles. But others have water in abundance."
He went on to explain the current exhibit, which his auditors, being quite tired by this stage, could not take in at all, although they kept nodding and smiling brightly. Comparing notes afterwards, they thought it might have been something to do with algae.

Gollum is questing! Episode 19/25

Their next port of call provided some welcome relaxation! They were each enveloped in a silky but tough bubble-like material and could float in a gravity-free chamber, bumping into each other and spinning in different directions!
"A bit like the dodgems on Earth," remarked Gollum.
They were all sorry when it was time to move on.

Gollum is questing! Episode 20/25

The last part of the entertainment became clear when they saw laser guns laid out for each of them! Dash hastened to explain that the lasers had been especially modified so that they could not do any harm with them, but could enjoy a pretend hunt, like paintballing or LaserQuest on Earth. Dash himself had not quite comprehended what either paintballing or LaserQuest were, but watching his guests having vociferous fun he got quite caught up in their enthusiasm!

Gollum is questing! Episode 21/25

All too soon the time of their departure arrived (although Dash had said that his kind didn't understand 'time' as a concept as they did). In the simulation suite, sitting on a sort of computer-generated rock, Treble led a vote of thanks for a most enjoyable adventure in space!

Gollum is questing! Episode 22/25

The simulation around them changed as Dash made a speech thanking the Earthlings for coming and praised them for enabling those on his planet to come to a better and deeper cultural appreciation of Planet Earth.

Gollum is questing! Episode 23/25

As a leaving gift, they provided a huge floating gem, which Treble, Windsor and Gollum enjoyed taking turns to balance on!

Gollum is questing! Episode 24/25

Gollum, Treble and Windsor slept all the way back to Earth and only woke when the transportation podule landed in their familiar wood back home. Again, the glittering brilliance of the podule seemed to make their surroundings much darker! They thanked Dash all over again for taking them on their trip into outer space, they shook paws with Trill-o-byte and waved the podule off as it rose slowly into the air, casting its pinky glow on the ground beneath.

Gollum is questing! Episode 25/25

"Thank you for coming, Gollum!" exclaimed Treble. "Please accept this token for your bravery."
Gollum grinned. "I think you were the brave one!" he said with a wink. "It's good to be back. Do you think we'll ever venture up into space again?"
Treble considered this. "I don't know, Gollum. It was very exciting but really quite, you know, exhausting! Perhaps, one day."
Far above them, a little green spaceship flashed its lights and sped off into the distance.
Gollum has completed their Alien Escapade! Please select another pet as visitor, so it can also take part!