Hey you! Yes you! I see you there admiring my lovely moley hole. Wanna come over and play? I know you wanna. C’mon! C’mon over! We can have soooooo much fun. Digging and burrowing and tunnelling. I promise I will help you see in the dark. Stop staring and come say hello.

What to do? What to do? It’s a really tough job being the top golden mole around here. Afterall, my likeness is on the exquisite GM coin. And I am so sought after. I must keep up my top physique for future photo shoots. But what to do? I need a friend to practise and train in my opal tossing. And burring through tunnels all day gets boring. Do you have anything good to eat? Maybe that can become my new sport.

So….very….tired. Who would have thought spending all day tossing opals and going for record long planks could exhaust an all star like me? I did well today though. I trained Jack Spaniels to fetch my opals after I toss them. I also succeeded at a record long 9 second(!!!!) plank! I deserve a rest. Don’t you agree? I do do my best planks in bed - flop!